2 weeks into the sch term and I'm already feeling stressed and dreading to go sch. oh boy. all that pressure to get at least a B for all subjects.

went joggin yest. 3 pathetic rounds round the track and I was out of wind. The blazing sun and the lack of stamina. Yes, it may be a good start, but I just don't feel good running at a pace and distance that is many many many times worse then when I was at peak. Seeing everybody else runnin farther and farther away, that sense of inferiority, despair.

i wish to start again, to push myself. it'll haunt me, no doubt. its presence is already lurking beneath the skin. i fear failure. i fear that by starting, it'll only cause more pain. motivated no more.

nostalgic ache.

i tried to write, but decided against it. things are better this way.

i slp too much sputnik spunned @7:01 AM